Change? Changes!

 

Is there anything truer than that statement?  Change is CONSTANT.  Change is non-stop.  Change is stress.  Change is joy.  Change is change?

I embrace change...when it is positive.  Meaning when it benefits me.  "Good" changes:  marriage, having a son,  better employment.  I embraced them all.   "Bad" changes:  unemployment (it has happened more than once to me and once is more than enough),  illness and death.  I didn't embrace those.  I pushed through them with sorrow, fear, frustration and anger.

I want, even long for, good change.  I am ready for a change of scenery.  I long for the "perfect" (ha!) home where we have more bedrooms, bathrooms and storage.  Where there is space between our home and the next.  Where I wake up to a view of mountains, trees, a lake...(Ocean would be nice, but that would NOT be a wise change.)  Where my life has less stress.  (I'd love to say no stress, but again, let's be reasonable.)  I want this change NOW!  

It ain't happening now.  I WILL happen...my husband and I are determined to make this change happen.  It's just a matter of...where, when and how!  We're planning, we're imagining.  (Thank you, Jane McGonigal, and Imaginable: How to See the Future Coming and Feel Ready for Anything-Even Things That Seem Impossible Today)  I am anxious to make this change and I am impatient.

As much as I want this change now, it's at the very least, several years down the road.  And it will require some sort of change in employment.  That does not necessarily mean leaving my current job.  I don't know how open management would be to me working remotely 90% of the time.  (Meaning coming into the office only a few times a year.)  There ARE people in my division who have never come into the office.  As far as I know they never had to come into an office due to the fact that they lived several hours away.  So if I did move, I would HOPE that I could do the same.  However...

On the other hand, who knows if I will be employed by the time we are able to move.  As of next week, the lines of business that I cover will change again.  (Reminder:  I started with and was hired by one company within a small corporation.  That corporation was purchased by a LARGE corporation and for a year or so I worked as I always did.  Then I picked up another company.  I did that for several years and then midway through last year another small business was added to my list.  Then in the 4th quarter of last year,  I was pulled from almost all of those businesses [keeping only a very small portion of the products that were sold by the original company that hired me] and give 3 new [to me] business lines.)  I'm still going to have the same 4 companies, but I will only be doing a portion of one of them.  (Similar to what happened when I was transitioned off most of the product work for "my" original company.)  I think this will be good for my stress level and sanity.  I don't think it will be good for the stress level and sanity of my co-worker who will be taking it on.  And while this will make my job "easier" I have to wonder if I am purposely being moved to types of products that are "dying out."  I've been working here (although "here" has changed) for nearly a decade and I've seen certain products fade away.  I don't feel good about predominantly working with business lines that may be destined for discontinuation.

So change is in the air.  There are some changes I can control and implement and there are others that I cannot.  So now more than ever it is important to for me to take a deep breath and remember:  "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."