Bfth's Boring Blog

If you are of a certain age (that would be my age), the name Shaun Cassidy might throw you back to The Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew Mysteries on Sunday nights, "That's Rock N Roll" and make your heart go pitter pat like it did back when you were a teen or tween.  If you were a true fan you might still have the albums (I do) or you might have the show on DVD (I could only find season 1). You might even know that this teen idol didn't completely fade away (although it might have felt like he did), he appeared on Broadway (I'm still bummed that I never saw "Blood Brothers") and has written and produced several tv shows (the most current being "New Amsterdam," but I was more of an "American Gothic" fan.)  He has a website and is somewhat active on social media.  And it was through this media, that I learned that he was going back on the road this spring/summer (after the pandemic had stopped his earlier attempt).  I may have missed out when I wa

  Summer is here (although it doesn't feel like it in my neck of the woods) and it is very clearly a time of endings and beginnings.   Today is the last day of my son's junior year of high school.  It has been a challenging year.  The first full in person school year since he was in middle school.  A year with an AP class (which he did very well in) and an honors class (which he did okay in).  Junior year has ended and his last year of high school is about to begin.   As with every year, this one has its summer assignments.  He already has an intense one from his AP Human Geography teacher.  It definitely is challenging, so I'm going to push him (and most likely fail) to get him working on it soon.  He also has a summer reading assignment, but he's not sure what that is.  There is the reading assignment for English students (in general) and there is a reading assignment for AP Lit and Composition.  My son was recommended for the AP course, but he has not been assign

    "And on the seventh day God ended His work which He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all His work which He had done. " This is how we know that God is GOD and not human.  Or at least not a human with elderly parents or children.  There is no rest for us. While I use the above as a joke; it is true that yesterday, the "day of rest" was anything but.  I'm not complaining (well, not MUCH) and I was well aware as I went into the weekend that it was going to be exhausting.   I tried to prepare myself as much as possible and focus on being positive and patient.  (Patience is a strength I have not had in the past, but I'm working on it and to give myself a pat on the bat, I think I'm doing much better!) After getting in a short(ish) walk (despite all the stressors around me I'm trying to keep the morning walks going as we have finally started to get warm weather), I headed for the NJ shore.  The warm weekends are not the time to be

Yes, it's another entry in the chronicles of "Dealing with Dementia."  (I'm seriously thinking bout starting a "sub series" in the blog called "The Dementia Diary."  After all, I did do the "virus diary" when Covid-19 came into our world.)  Time to get on the roller coaster once again.  Although I *think* I have figured out the ride.  (Having said that the ride will probably change course, but...) When mom is asleep she is ASLEEP.  It's best to just leave her be.  If she has to be awaken, it's going to be difficult.  She will definitely NOT be coherent and if left to her own devices she will go back to sleep. When mom wakes up, she is semi-coherent.  It takes her a while to come fully awake and as such, when she speaks she has "mush mouth."  It might be difficult to understand, but if you take your time you can figure out what she is saying 90% of the time.  It's best to give he

  "When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide. Where I stop and I turn and I go for a ride. Till I get to the bottom…" I quote these lyric because I'm a huge Beatles fan.  Topping that Paul McCartney is performing not 15 miles away from my home and I'm not going.  One, because it's too damned expensive (love you Paul, but I don't have the cash) and two, because I'm exhausted.  It is because of that, despite the fact that my teen son suddenly said he wanted to go see Paul (could he have spoken up any sooner?), that I am about to crash and not spend a mountain of cash to see my idol. They lyrics to the song though could describe the last 24 hours (give or take) in my life. It starts off with the call that I received from the palliative care social worker yesterday afternoon with concerns about my mom's lack of eating.  There is real concern with her calorie count.  I arrange to have the next day off to go down to the hospital to try and g

  I'll admit it; I'm exhausted.  A little physically, but mostly this exhaustion is on an emotional level and while I can try to take care of myself, let's face it I'm not.  I'm overwhelmed and drained.  But I am doing my best to move forward and to make sense of life; to that end I thought writing everything down would be helpful, so here I go... I saw my mom at home on May 29th (Memorial Day weekend).  I brought my son and husband with me to help me out (my emotional support men).  Mom was not doing well.  She was rather lethargic and either hallucinating (thinking there was a bird in the house) or not perceiving things correctly (an orange cloth hung over the kitchen faucet was interpreted as a woman with orange hair).  She had been home from the hospital (where she had been diagnosed with dementia) for just over a week and was seeing a neurologist that Thursday (June 2nd; aka Prom night).  As the week went on her mental status seemed to improve.  The neurologist

  I consider myself lucky.  I have only been admitted to the hospital once in my adult life. During my 3 day stay after my hysterectomy in 2008, I was in a room by myself.  I realize that this is a rarity and a luxury. My husband ended up in our local community hospital (which no longer exists and is now townhouses) for nearly a week.  During his time there he had a roommate, an elderly man, who called out for his mother.  It disturbed my (soon to be) husband on many levels. Both of my parents have been in and out of the hospital over the past several years.  During those stays they have consistently had the same two complaints; the quality of the food (no surprise there) and their roommate. If we are honest, no one wants a roommate when they are in the hospital.  No one is ever at their best when they are hospitalized. (If they were they wouldn't be there.)  Most of us just want to be alone.  We want to be left to our own devices.  We want our own way.  With a roommate that

  Lately I've been going through difficulties and I've been writing about it (because it helps ME to write), but I don't want to be a constant Debbie Downer (or should that be Blue Bfth?).  As stressful as things have been, there are still bright spots.  One of those spots happened just over a week ago when my son, who is a junior, went to the prom. Full disclosure, I never went to the prom.  (Insert sounds of sympathy here).  I didn't have a boyfriend in high school (more sympathetic sighs) and "back in the day" you went to the prom with a date.  While I had male friends, none of them asked me to the prom and I certainly wasn't comfortable asking them!  So I had no prom experience. Several months ago my son told me he intended to go to the Junior/Senior prom.  I assumed (and you know what that makes me) that he would ask his girlfriend.  I am not out of touch so much, that I don't know that "prom-posals" are a thing.  (Indeed a neighbor&

 Back in April, I made plans for my birthday.  Maybe that's a little crazy for someone my age, but... It was spring break and we were vacationing at my happy place (aka  Skytop ).  They were renovating the Windsor dining room so meals were being held on the lower level in the Laurel room (which was nice, but no Windsor).  I learned that they were getting all new furniture and getting rid of what they had.  Immediately I started thinking; the chairs would match my kitchen.  And so a plot was hatched...the manager agreed to hold 3 chairs for me (I wanted 9 so that I could have three in the kitchen and 6 in my dining room, but I would have had to rent a van to get them from PA to NJ) and I would pick them up.  The date I picked?  My birthday, June 7th, which also happened to be a Tuesday, generally a slower day of the week for the resort and for me at work.  I would drive up with my husband, get the chairs, enjoy lunch in the Taproom and then head home.  A three hour round trip driv

  If you've been reading my blog regularly (and I hope you have, you know that I have a teen who is currently a junior and I (we) are trying to work with him and prepare him for college.  (I'm not sure if I'M prepared!)  One of the challenges I've had with him (and this is ongoing) is with planning and forward thinking.  You need to prepare. It's not just my son who needs to learn this lesson, as I found out when I saw an email from the drama teacher.  It was to a whole group and in part said:   I have to say that I'm disappointed no cast is going to perform at the Arts festival, and that I'm finding that out today. It would have been better to let me know in advance that no one wanted to do it instead of refusing to reply to my requests to sign up. Maybe we could have scheduled a scene from the falls production, or a song from the musical, but as it is, I'm finding out today that no one wants to do it, and now we have nothing to do for the slot that we

 It's June 2, 2022.  For me there are a few things that stand out on this day. Number 1:  Today my mom will see a neurologist.   When she was released from the hospital nearly 2 weeks ago with a diagnosis of dementia, a neurologist was recommended.  We all knew a neurologist was necessary.  The physician that they recommended could not see her until July.  Two months after she would have been diagnosed.  I know that physicians are overextended and overworked, but two months is too long, especially when it comes to neurology.  Thankfully, my father did some on line work and found a physician in the area (sort of) that is able to see her today.  (The appointment was made approximately two weeks ago).  I have no idea if this man is "good" or "bad."  I've looked at reviews on line (don't we all) and they are relatively positive.  What's important is that he is able to see her and evaluate her.  I don't expect a miracle (although we always hope and