Dear John
14 years have gone by. Although chunks of this day have slightly faded from my memory (I don't know whether that's good or bad), I will never forget that it was a Saturday. And that the following day I was supposed to sponsor Rayna at her confirmation at church. (I thought that it was Pentecost, but I Googled it and no... but then Pentecost would have been Memorial Day weekend, so maybe they figured we'd have a better crowd the following week...Maybe they did. I didn't go.) I wish it hadn't been a month and a half since I'd last seen you. I wish we'd seen you more. I still can't understand why our having James pulled you and Emma away from family gatherings. How it bothered her. But she had a son, who we never met. Who wasn't at your wedding. But her mother was and that was the first time we met her. File those under things that I will never understand. I wish you were still here. You SHOULD still be here. Why, Why, WHY ...