Bfth's Boring Blog

White:  The ghost that hangs on my front door.  (Although he is getting spotty gray with mold or grime from living in the basement the rest of the year.)  If you are smart enough (or look close enough) you will see the button that when pushed makes him moan and groan and turn other colors under this white veneer. Gray:  My son's face as her puts on make up for his film noir character.  After all film noir is always done in black and white, right?  Let's just hope that it doesn't become permanently gray. (Did I purchase enough Ponds cleansing cream to get it all off??)  And if he eats too much candy, ashen may just be what he looks and feels like for the next day or so. Black:  The "cape" of Mr. Bones who has lived in our bushes for many a year at Halloween.  He came with a stand originally, which broke almost immediately.  Now his pole for a body is propped up among my many bushes, he's black eyes peering out from his white/gray skull. Gr

Back in August, I promised my son that we would return to Skytop  in the fall to see the foliage.  We wouldn't stay for the weekend, but we could do a drive up and back in one day if he wanted.  (He DID!)  As a family we have been in the winter and summer,which are beautiful seasons.  We've never been in the spring.  We've been in the fall, but late in the season during the NJ Teacher Convention break (2nd weekend in November).  It's lovely then too...     The problem is that most of the lovely colors are gone by that time.  So I wanted to take a day and really soak in the color.  While walking around the trails that Skytop has to offer. This year has proven to be a challenge.  We've had much more rain than usual (which impacted our summer trip to Skytop), temperatures were mostly above normal in the fall (A/C in October in NJ?  Yes!) and have a busy schedule.  We've had plans and obligations from September 14th on.  Or it was going to rain all weekend.

With most sincere apologies to Elton John and Bernie Taupin, I don't think sorry is the hardest word.  Quite the opposite in my opinion.  It is all too easy to say "sorry."   After all, it's just a word.   Saying "sorry" and BEING sorry are two different things.  Saying sorry is easy.  BEING sorry is harder.  And making amends and changing what we are sorry for is the hardest of them all. Saying "I'm sorry" means nothing. I think of the story that has been told of a woman dropping a plate which shatters into thousands of tiny bits. The woman than looks at the plate and says "I'm sorry."  Maybe she is.  Maybe she isn't.  It doesn't change the fact that the plate is shattered and will never be the same, even if she does manage to glue it back together. I am constantly saying to my son, "I don't want you to say you're sorry.  I want you to BE sorry and change/correct/do X so that you don't hav

Autumn has come to NJ. Let me rephrase that...after an extended summer (last Wednesday was 80+ outside), pre-winter has come to NJ (morning temps in my area were anywhere from 37-42).  The autumn that I know and love (moderate days perfect for pumpkin spice lattes and sweatshirts that can be removed mid-day and cool evenings perfect for sleeping with the window open for a gentle breeze and cuddling under a blanket with no need for the furnace to turn on), has ceased to exist.  Forget the beautiful foliage...the most of the leaves are still on the trees and green.  A few have started to turn, but they, like me, don't know what to do.  It was too wet from April on.  Summer was hot, as expected, by incredibly humid (even more so than usual) and the fun weekends at the beach were hampered by overcast skies.  We thought autumn was coming, but then summer was back in October!  (Who in the Northeast has their A/C on in OCTOBER???)  Now we're in the middle of the month and we're f

I think we might all agree that there is just too much negativity in this world.   Which is why I TRY to be positive.  I try to write about positive things.  That's why I wanted to share these thoughts today. On a regular basis I drive more than just my son to school.  Depending on the day, I take one or more of his friends as our school music program starts before the official school day, which is pretty early for a tween or teen.  So, I volunteer to drive and then head off to work. All the kids I take (including my son) are great, but I want to focus on one today...the girl who lives up the block. I'm not going to give her name, but I'll address her as S (which is her first initial).  I've known S since she and her family first moved into our neighborhood.  She's my son's age (ok, a few months older), so they've been playing together since they were 5 or so years old.  She's the oldest sibling in a family of 4 kids and while I'm sur

Dr. Cirello, I'd like to think of myself as a "good" person, so I SHOULD be happy that you are retiring and will now have the time to do what YOU want to do.  On the other hand, I'm selfish and I really don't want you to! You are an extended part of my family and have been so for most of my life.  (Which dates me!  Yikes!) You entered our lives in 1979; I think we were some of your first patients.  From day one, you were a savior.  (Which was a pretty amazing way to start a doctor/patient relationship.)  I mean that literally.  We had been away on vacation at the Jersey shore.  My brother (who was not yet 7) had gotten sick and we came home early as a result.  Our family doctor had recently retired and my mother didn't know who to turn to.  Luckily, she remembered one of our neighbors (a trio of "old ladies" who lived on our block) had been to see the new doctor in town.  She got his name and number from her and immediately got an appointmen

There are parents who are called "Helicopter Parents."  I'm TRYING to avoid that.  If anything, I'm a Drone parent...I keep an eye out, see what's going on and swoop back out and try to stay out of the way.  My son is at an age when he needs to advocate for himself and that is something that we are working on with him.  It's obvious that he's matured over the past year, but he still has some struggles with some subjects and is reluctant to ask for assistance.  (Because it's EMBARRASSING MOM!)  So although I have made a conscious effort to be hands off (although I DO oversee), I still remind him to write his planner, check Google classroom and such. Every kid has his or her struggles when it comes to school, be it academic or otherwise.  What can make all the difference in the world is the teacher.  This is the tale of two teachers.  Both of whom teach subject that my son tends to struggle with and how they have handled the situation (from my persp

I see a guy walking by the high school.  He's wearing a football uniform; and he's headed for the playing field.  It's obvious that he's a football player. So I can also assume that he's in remedial classes, right?  He's a jock; he must be dumb right?    And if he gets hurt while playing in the game, it's his fault.  He was asking for it.  Is that assumption wrong? I mean if you saw a girl walking down the street and she was wearing a low cut blouse and a short skirt, you'd assume that she was a slut, right? If she was attacked or raped, she was asking for it right?  Is THAT assumption wrong? What's the difference between the two?  I don't think there's a lot.  In both cases assumptions were made based on the way the person looked.  And if something bad happens to them while they are dressed the way they are; they are at fault.  That's the way we play the blame game, right? If you forgot to lock your door last night and you were r

...there is only US.  (Isn't it fitting that US is also U.S.?  UNITED States!) We may have differing opinions.  We may have differing beliefs. But we are ALL human beings.  (Yes, I've said this a zillion times before.)   Setting the scene so that is US vs THEM does no good; it only harms.  It only separates and divides.  And we certainly don't need more division.  We don't need to stand on separate sides of the street.  We need to come out to the center and shake hands.  We need to recognize that we are one. It is time to stop dismissing others.  Just because they have different views than you does not make them "lesser."  While we are the same at the core; there are differences.   I may be smarter than you.  You may be more physically fit than me.  I may believe X, while you firmly believe Y.  None of this makes you better than me or vice versa. Let me repeat that:  NONE OF THIS MAKES YOU BETTER THAN ME OR VICE VERSA!  (I know I said no yel

...AKA:  Teachers work from early morn to late night day!   Google tells me that today is World Teachers' Day...I didn't know there was such a thing.  But apparently there is, so Thank You to all the teachers out there.  The ones that I know and the ones that I don't.  YOU make a difference is so many ways.  You don't get the acclaim or the money but darn it you should! It's amusing that today is World Teacher Day since last night was Back to School night for our school.  As a parent who gets up around 4:30 in the morning, heading back to school (where I dropped the kid off at 7:30 that morning) at 6:15 at night (because that's the time slotted for Music Parents, matching the early morning Period 0 that the music program encompasses) was no thrill for me. I can't imagine what it must be for you.  You've spent the whole day teaching (and I KNOW the day doesn't start at 8:30 when classes officially start OR end when the last bell rings) an

Sometimes things just happen; life's puzzle pieces fall into place and you have that "ah ha!" moment.  I had that moment this morning...after being frustrated and angry by two separate incidents that occurred yesterday. So let me start off with my rants: At work, I have either volunteered or been volunteered (I'm not 100% on it at this point) to help out with our annual sales meeting.  It started 3 years ago when I helped the person who did the leg work.  Then last year when that person was gone, I helped the manager who was running it.  It wasn't completely altruistic; I have food allergies and wanted to make sure that I would be able to have something to eat.  This year, I helped with a venue change and made suggestions on dining.  I *thought* everything was in place, but then...When I realized the venue we had chosen for our annual dinner was in the path of some major construction (meaning a 10 minute dr