SOMWaD: He Was Late and I Was Proud

Let me start out by saying, that I HATE being late.  It's the way I was brought up.  I am obsessed with being on time and usually end up early.  Even when I "try" to be late, it doesn't work.  I'm not saying that this is a good thing or a bad thing; it's just a thing.  

As a result, my son is the same way.  He hates to be late.  And until yesterday, I don't think he was ever late for anything.

Being late for school is usually not something a mom would be proud of, but I am.  Of course it's  not the being late that I'm really proud of, but how he handled it.  He proved himself to be a responsible young man and that's something as a parent I have been striving for.  

But let me start at the beginning...

Wednesdays and every other Friday are the ONLY days that my son goes to school at the "regular" time.  Since he needs to be at school between 7:30 and 7:40 on Mondays and Thursdays for band and Tuesdays and every other Friday for chorus, I drive him.  If he were to walk downtown to school on those mornings he would have to leave by 7:05 or so.  I can't see him getting out the door that early (getting him out of bed, especially in the winter months is a challenge) and at that hour there aren't always crossing guards.  He has walked to school on "regular" days, but 90% of the time his best friend's father drives him.  (And I pick up the friend for band on Monday and Thursday mornings.)  It is also important to note that I have to be at work by 8:30.  This is no problem on the "early" days as I get in early (and no one complains about that).  On "regular" days I need to leave the house by 7:50. We are a one car family and my husband doesn't drive, so essentially once I have left for the day the only way to get anywhere is to walk.

Yesterday, I left home fully expecting my son to be picked up by his friend's mother since she had told my husband she would do so on Monday.  I don't know what happened: if she forgot, if something happened at home or something else, but when no one showed by 8:15, my husband hustled my son out the door.  

As he watched him go, he saw our neighbor up the block pulling out and say our son speaking to him.  My husband ASSUMED that our son would get a ride with the neighbor since his daughter goes to the same school.  My husband was wrong.  Our son walked.  He refused a ride, not once, but twice from the neighbor, not because he was afraid or unsure, but because (and these are his own words) "I didn't want to be a bother."  (Which lead us to a teaching moment with our son later in the day:  It's ok to accept help when offered.  When someone volunteers assistance, it's not a bother .)

He continued on in the cold and reached the school approximately 4 minutes late.  (This is according to the school attendance record that I was able to check out on line.)  He knew he was late, which was could have been enough to upset him.  If this had been earlier in the school year, it could have resulted in a meltdown.  Instead he did exactly what he should have.  He went directly to the main office and requested a tardy slip.  He did so without complaint and then quickly made his way to his homeroom (which also is where his first period class is held).  No whining; no tears.  (Is this the kid who had trouble adjusting to middle school just a few months ago?)  Although it was not a good start to the day (and in general he admitted that it just wasn't a good day overall), he got through it.  Life handed him a situation that was uncomfortable and he dealt with it.  For that alone, I am a proud mom.

It's a lesson that I could stand to remember myself when things don't go my way.  Just deal with it in a mature way and move on.  There's no need for excuses, whining or complaining.  Life will be unfair sometimes and situations will arise that you have no control of.  Simply accept it and keep going.  

If my kid can do it; so can I.