Dear Dad: June 25th, 2024



 Dear Dad,

It's a hot summer day at the shore.  Yesterday was the first race of the season for the BBYRA, so of course I was thinking of you and knowing how much you would have wanted to be out there on the bay.  (While also NOT wanting to be out there...it is possible to love something and also dislike it at the same time, especially when relying on nature.)

The wind was typical yesterday and by typical I mean ever changing.  There was no air in the morning, so you would have been sweltering under the sun.  I put the a/c on in the house.  Then then wind picked up and I was able to go out on the deck and be comfortable, first under the umbrella (which I managed to get out of the shed and [sort of] assemble on my own) and then in the sun sitting on the lounge chair.  It actually got cooler, and more windy, in the afternoon. (No surprise there.)  It actually got chilly and I put on a sweater (one of mom's; the one with all the sailboats on it).  (Meanwhile, just 50 miles north the temperatures are nearing 100 and here I am in a sweater!)Then it started to rain. (I left the car windows open and had to run out in the rain to roll them up.)  First the rain came in from the south, so I shut those windows.  Then the wind switched and the rain started coming in from the north.  I couldn't keep up with it.  (You never can.)  Again, typical, but anything but.  By the end of the afternoon, the rain stopped and the sun came out.  I opened up the house again and the winds were blowing in so strongly that I had to shut more windows and put on warmer pjs that night.  (I was COLD and debating putting an extra comforter on my side of the bed.  Of course by midnight, the house was hot and opening the windows no longer offered relief.  So back the a/c went on.  Yes, as you knew, the atypical is often typical on this little barrier island.

This morning I walked early, knowing that it was going to be hot and humid.  It WAS humid (and a little hot) before 6 in the morning.  But again, by the time I headed up to the beach, the temperature dropped a good ten degrees and the fog rolled in making it hard to see the ocean from the top of the dune.  It was chilly!  And walking back to the house, I could feel the areas of cold and the patches of hot. (Note:  where they are large houses it is hot and the patches of undeveloped land are chilly.  What does this tell us?)

Another reason I walked so early this morning is because I wanted to go to the 8 AM service at St. Simon by the Sea.  It is the church that I most associate with you.  (Even though you were a member of various churches throughout your life and you attended Church of the Holy Spirit virtually every Sunday until the week before you died.  It was the last physical church you were in, for mom's service in July of 2022.  And it was where I held your memorial last year. I didn't sit as close to the altar as you could have. (I'm still not exactly sure what to do; when to stand and when to sit and I'll admit I need a better road map for the Book of Common Prayer.)  It was cool and quiet.  I know the priests serving today would not have been one of your favorites.  (I know who that is...I think he knows too.)  You would have thought of them as "those kids."  And they put out the candles "incorrectly" (Left always goes last.)  Being there made me sad in some ways, but I felt I had to go.  It is my way of honoring you.  (Which means I will have to go back again this summer when I am down here.)

I TRIED to go to the beach this morning (after church), but while it was nearly 90 at the house, it was still COLD at the beach.  (Everyone had sweatshirts or were wrapped in towels.)  I find it amazing that the beach block can be 72 and the house (2-1/2 blocks away) can be over 90.   I think I need my favorite meteorologists (from CBS NY) to come out and do a study.

Today would be the first NBYC Sunday Sail for 2024. I wonder how it's going.  I wonder how they are surviving (will survive) without you.  You and mom were the program.  No matter what they do there, it will never be the same (or as good) as when you were there.  (I'm biased; shoot me.)

Today also marks one year since your grandson graduated high school.  I wish you could have been there.  I think back on the days when you were "the voice" of the high school music program and know that if you could have been there a year ago, that voice would have been loud and proud.  I am incredibly proud of "our boy." having gotten all as this past semester and bound for Dean's List for the 2nd semester in a row.  I know you and mom are proud too.

As we get closer to July, you and mom are on my mind continually.  How can there be another summer at the shore without you?  I have so many years (decades) of memories and while the ocean may wash away the sands, my memories of you, particularly during the summer, will hold fast.

I love you,

Me


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