Support Network
We are not alone. Sometimes it is hard to remember and/or accept this, but we are NOT alone.
It's also important to remember
that everyone needs support and help at various times in their life. This
is not a sign of weakness; it is part of life and being a human being.
When a baby is born, it needs
help. You wouldn't expect a child to be born and then just leave it to its
own devices. An infant cannot feed itself or take care of itself.
It doesn't mean that babies are dumb or incapable. Infants need time to
learn and grow. In order to do that they need a support system. A
baby needs a parent (or parents) or relatives or a capable adult to take care
of their needs. As a baby develops, grows and matures, in most cases he
or she will eventually be able to take care of himself/herself. A child would
not and IS NOT able to mature without help. A baby cannot survive on its
own. A child cannot survive on its own. A teen cannot survive on its
own. Even a capable adult cannot survive completely on their own.
It was John Donne who said in
1624: "No man is an Island, entire of it self; every man is a piece
of the Continent, a part of the main." It was true then and it
continues to be true now. We are all part of something bigger.
Sometimes we are the helper; sometimes we need to be helped. That is the
way of the world.
Why am I pointing out the obvious
now? Mostly because I am at a point in my life when I need to be the
helper and I also need help. I guess that means I am middle aged
(although actually I think I've passed that point) because I truly in the
middle...sandwiched in between being a parent to a teen who is growing more
independent every day (a good thing; if something that is hard for me to
accept) and "parenting" my parents (which is REALLY
difficult!). All while doing this I need to remember to take care of me
as well. (Remembering the advice of airline staff: put the oxygen
mask on yourself before assisting others. You can't help those around you
if you yourself are in distress.)
My son is a capable young
man. My parents are capable people. Both need help; both are
reluctant to accept it. My job is to convince them to get the help they
need Not easy because as I have said, they are all independent (and
perhaps too proud?) to ask for it.
I am hoping that I am strong
and wise enough to be able to make them see that asking for help is not a sign
of weakness. No matter where we are in our journey of life; asking for
help is what we need to do. There is no shame to ask for or receive
help.
Right now, I am the
helper. There will come a time in my life when I need to ask for help.
There WILL come a time when I will ask for help because I will need help
helping others. (As in right now I am able to get down and take care of
my parents when necessary, but there will be a time when I cannot or when help
is needed immediately.)
Yes, even helpers need
help. So do not be afraid or ashamed to ask. Help when you
can. Ask for help when you need it. We can all help. We
should all ask for help when we need it.
Supporting each other; this is
what life is all about.
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