Let's Talk About Dentists

I have nothing against dentists.  I've had dentists I've LOVED; I've had ones I've not liked that much.  I've had good experience and I've had badly.  (Probably more bad than good though...)  And while I've not had anything that major done to my mouth (other than wisdom teeth removal over 30 years ago which is a horror story unto itself), I have to say that I HATE going to the dentist.

I don't say this to discourage anyone for going.  You've got to go.  You need to go twice a year.  You need to take care of your teeth.  (Heck, you need to take care of all of your body, but that's a whole other post/story.)  You need to brush your teeth.  You need to floss.  (I can't be the only one who HATES flossing, right?  Who came up with the idea of running thread between the spaces in your teeth?  Google says Levi Parmly, a dentist.  What was he thinking???)

Let's get back to going to the dentist.  Is there anyone out there that actually LIKES going? 

I did know someone once who loved to get her teeth cleaned.  She said she felt better after going to the dentist.  She is the only person I ever met who felt that way.

Again, this is nothing against dentists as people, but the whole "cleaning" thing totally freaks me out.  I understand that cleaning is important.  I understand that good dental hygiene is important.  What I don't get is why metal hooks need to be put into my mouth so that my teeth can be "scraped" and my gums prodded.  Just take a look at the implements dentists use; sharp pointy metal things. The very type of objects that we tell our children NOT to put in their mouths.  Then you have to hold your mouth open while someone takes this implement and "cleans."  You get to lie there (I have found that most of those chairs are not incredibly comfortable; although I did come across one that gave you a little massage, which made the experience a little more tolerable) while a bright light shine in your eyes (so that the dentist can see...I get that) and your mouth hanging open in an unnatural state. (And I've been told I have a small mouth.  I don't disagree.  But that means opening as wide as possible and then having my mouth contorted into whatever position that dentist needs.)  What is NOT stressful about that?  Who WOULD look forward to that?

Then there are x-rays.  Again, realize that they are important.  I don't want cavities.  And if I DO get one, I want it found (hence the x-ray) and taken care of BEFORE it become a really big problem.  HOWEVER, the x-ray procedure is another process that raises my stress level.  You're under a heavy apron (to protect you) and again lying in a chair that has you in a somewhat unnatural position.  Then you have this piece of cardboard or something like it (I know technology has upgraded and individual "film" has been replaced with a plastic like "thing") angled in your mouth while you bite down and try not to gag as this thing that looks like it could shoot laser beams is pointed at you and the x-ray is taken.  This happens 4 - 8 times so that all angles can be achieved.  Don't flinch.  Don't move.  Or you'll have to do it some more.  Again, I have a small mouth and positioning the "film" isn't easy or comfortable.  I know this only takes a couple of minutes, but it feels like an eternity while I'm trying to stay still and not choke or vomit.

Then there is the actual "brushing."  This is not painful.  (Other than you still have to have your mouth hanging open and are lying in that chair counting the seconds until this will all be over.)  However, the SOUND of the brush.  WHY do all motorized instruments that dentists use, be it brush, drill, or whatever, sound so horrible?  That's that whirly, grindy high pitched noise!  Why not just have someone stand in the room and run their fingernails up and down a chalkboard?  That would be more relaxing!  That high pitched squeal that I hear even as I sit in the waiting room before my appointment makes my skin crawl!

When you are finally released (FREEDOM) they give you one of those little plastic baggies with a toothbrush, toothpaste and floss.  (I used to get mouth wash too, but my dentist has discontinued doing that.  Might have been too costly.  Maybe that explains why in addition to dentistry the office is now offering BOTOX?  You've contorted my mouth into all sorts of weird shapes so now I have wrinkles all over my face, but you can fix that by injecting me with a toxin, right?)  I appreciate the freebies, but the little plastic baggie?  Can't we come up with something better?  It's not big enough to re-use (even as a trash can liner) and isn't attractive enough to use as a small gift bag.  It's not environmentally friendly.  Basically, it just drives me batty!  (Not that it takes much!)

What are your thoughts on going to the dentist.  I know I'm not the ONLY one who feels this way about at least SOME of those things, but am I on point on each and every one?  Let me know that I'm not alone.   Make suggestions as to how I (and anyone else reading this) can make the experience less stressful.  Share your stories!  I want to know!


Popular posts from this blog

Not Guilty

Please Don't Ask Me...

Lowe's LIES