The Red Shirt

 

There has been a red shirt (men's short sleeve button down) hanging (on a hanger) on the doorknob of my coat closet (which is two steps up from my living room; the staircase continues to the 2nd floor) since the end of July.  I brought it up from the shore house.  It was my father's shirt.  He never wore it.  (Or at least as far as I can tell.)  It has a small emblem on it; it's from the Lavallette Yacht Club.  My parents were members there.  (They were very much into sailing on Barnegat Bay and so were active in more than one club.)  It was at the LYC that my mother had her last social outing.  (And if I think about it, it was probably the last place she had a "real" dinner...after that it was all hospital and rehab.)  My father gave up his membership in 2023 because he was no longer able to get out and go there.  It was the right decision, but one that I felt since in addition to sailing events, my parents frequently went there for dinner and sometimes they'd take me.

Back to the shirt.  I brought it home and hung it on that doorknob.  And it's been sitting there.  It's too small for my husband and too big from my son (who wouldn't wear it anyway).  I thought perhaps my cousin might like it when he came to visit in August, but he has no ties to Lavallette and he's not fond of red.  I keep thinking maybe I should try it on, but I already have 2 Lavallette Yacht Club shirts (one of which is "starting to go" after several years of wear and tear.)

I haven't brought it to the thrift shop.  I've brought most of my parents' clothes there.  (I try not to think about that.  I want their clothes to be sold, worn and enjoyed, but on the other hand I don't.)  However, it's brand new and for some reason that has been stopping me from bringing it.  It doesn't have a tag on it which would prove it was new and never worn, but...

So it sits there.   Or rather it hangs there.  Every day I pass it.  Multiple times during the day.  And I think to myself that I need to do something about that shirt.  But I don't.  So it sits there.

Maybe writing this will force me to pick it up and bring it with me when I next volunteer at the shop.  Or will enough days have passed from writing this and volunteering that I will "forget" about it?

I feel guilty for having it just hang there.  I feel guilty for not knowing what to do with it.  And I wonder why I am so focused (or not focused) on this red shirt.

It's going on 4 months and I need to do something.  The holidays are almost upon us, I need do to something, but I still don't know what.

Does anyone want a men's large red button down short sleeved shirt with a small logo on the front? Anyone?  Guide me.  Make a suggestion.  Help me out here!

Thank you.