Back in the Newark Groove?


I'm back at my workstation, on the 4th floor of a building in Newark.  I can't remember the exact last time I was here.  It was probably mid-June.  But the last time I was here my son was not yet a high school graduate; my father was still alive.  So it's a bit weird to be sitting here in the dim light (the way I like it; until my co-worker comes in and turns on the light to full glare) looking out at the haze that sits over the city.  I don't want to be here (even though it is cooler than working in my home office, though soon I suppose I will be freezing and having to put on my company fleece over my sleeveless sundress which is the right thing to wear when it is going to be over 90 outside). 

I've been working remotely from one of my two homes.  (How awkward is it to say that?  It sounds like I have a lot of money, when I don't.  I do have more money than I've had before and once upon a time I would have considered myself well off, but the bar on that has changed.)  I say two homes, but really only one is officially mine at this point; the house at the shore is still in my mother's name and that's something that I am working on changing with my parents’ lawyer.  (Who doesn't get back to me in what I consider a timely fashion and honestly, I don't have that great of an impression of her, but once the transfer is complete, I'm done.  If I need a lawyer, and I suppose I will someday, I'll have to find one myself...just like I need to find a plumber for the shore house because the one my parents used has been unresponsive and not just this one time.)  I'd rather be working from the shore.  It's much more serene there, even with all the construction that is going on.  I actually like my dad's desk better than the one I have and it goes without saying the small space that I have in the actual office.  With the windows open, a nice breeze and some smooth jazz (courtesy of one of the music stations on the tv), I do pretty darned good.  I was able to take advantage of it for several weeks, but the time has come to get back in the groove.  (Even though it's a groove I'm not too fond of.)

If this post seems scattered (or more scattered than usual), it's because that's how I feel. (Or how I am?)  I think back on all the change that has happened since I last sat in this chair and it's kind of mind blowing.  So much of my life (my family's life) has been turned on end since mid-June.  That's not that long ago.  Although in many ways it seems like an eternity.  There's been graduation, vacation, and death seemingly all at once.  (Seemingly?)  My son is halfway through his summer job and I am (hopefully) more than halfway through all the administrative BS that comes with the death of a loved one.  Everyone expresses their sympathies, but it becomes background noise after a while. Meanwhile you're wading through paperwork and trying to make sure that you've covered all your bases, KNOWING that you haven't.  Dealing with the funeral home is the easy part.  Setting up the memorial (or in my case multiple ones...number two is coming up with weekend) isn't too complicated.  (Although arranging the timing can be challenging and does everyone who needs to know or SHOULD know, KNOW?)  Closing accounts can be simple...or it cannot.  (It depends.  Amex did a really good job.  Sunoco...I'm still not sure about that one.)  Dealing with financial institutions...who knows?  I've faced Bank of America again, this time dealing with someone at the shore know I had worked with before and he had everything on his end covered, but there's still a wait until I get the money from the accounts and where did the last long term care claim go?  (The company seems to have sent it to my father's account made out to his estate, but since the bank has locked everything, I'm not sure if it actually made it.)

Then there's the cleaning out of the "stuff."  It hasn't been a month, but I've made a great deal of progress.  I (often with the help of my husband) have filled more garbage bags than I can count.  (Pick up is only once a week and I have FILLED those huge cans to the brim and then some.)  There's so much paper!  Desk drawers full of paperwork.  Desk tops stacked with paper.  So much "stuff."  So many donations have been made.  (Try to get someone to answer a phone call about whether they would take certain items!  Waiting for someone to call you back!  This is why "my" thrift shop got 3 walkers and 2 canes and Goodwill got the wheelchair and unused potty chair.)  The house has been aired and cleaned.  There is still more to do, but it DOES feel less "sick" and homier. Fair from perfect, but a place that I can relax in.  That is when I get the time to relax.

Which brings me back (sort of) to being in an office in Newark.  A space where I am NOT relaxed and where what I have to do (in addition to work) weighs on my mind.  I have been able to accomplish much BECAUSE I was working remotely.  Now I still CAN work remotely, but I need to schedule out when I will be in an office and when I can be at the shore for such mundane duties as being there for a plumber.  (Of course I have to find a new one first...and then get them to commit to showing on a day that I can be there.)  Plus there are days when I'm not in the office, but I can't be at the shore either:  like my son's upcoming 18th birthday (there should be a big celebration, but...) and preparing for his move to college (https://bfthsboringblog.blogspot.com/2023/07/the-nest-reality.html)

The GOOD news is I am off work for most of next week.  My cousin is visiting and my whole family is so excited to see him again.  (Or in my son's case FINALLY meet him.)  This is going to be one of the highlights of the year.  Then at the end of the month (if my son can get all his pre-college stuff done) we are having a short "do over" vacation.  And finally, when my son is safely settled on campus, my husband and I will (hopefully) take some time to hang out at the shore...and maybe even celebrate our anniversary!  (We never really celebrated 20 or 25, so maybe it's time to go all out for 27?)

Well I've popped all this out in an hour and the office is starting to fill, so...let me get back to the Newark groove.

 


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