Caitlyn or Bruce...It's Not That Big a Deal
Unless you've had your head buried in the sand for the past couple of days, reading my post headline/title, you know who I'm talking about. It's all over the "news;" or what passes for news these days and Caitlyn Jenner will be on the cover of the next issue of Vanity Fair.
All this is much ado about nothing; at least from my standpoint.
Now I'm not saying that the issue is unimportant. I'm not saying learning about the facts and understanding is unimportant. I'm saying that as far as it goes for me, it's not that big a deal.
And it wasn't that big a deal when a friend of mine called me several years ago and told me she was about to become "John." I thought it was a little strange and maybe even weird, but it didn't really matter to me. I'm sure it was monumental for John and all that he had to go through; when I seriously think about it (and I really didn't) it must have been very difficult. (Especially since John is self-employed and I'm sure did not have the financial resources that Caitlyn has.) But for me it wasn't really that big a deal.
When I went to college; John was a woman. (I went to a women's college.) Becoming a man did not change the status of our friendship. We still share the same memories and laughs. John is the same person who made late night French onion soup runs with me. John is still the friend who helped move sets and dropped a fence on my big toe during a black out. John is still the person who sings loudly (and sometimes, I say with love, off key) "I Chose Right" from the musical "Baby." Woman or man, it doesn't matter to me; John is my friend. To me, John is the same person and I love him just as much as I did when we did crazy college things.
John is also one handsome looking guy now. Although in full disclosure I must say that John and I live on difference coasts, so I've only seen photos. Unlike celebrity photos, his are not photo shopped. He's not drop dead gorgeous, but he IS very handsome. And I think he's happy. I hope he's happy.
The fact that John was once a woman is just not that big a deal to me. Just like when a friend of mine came out. I know it must have been incredibly difficult for her. This was "way back" in the 1980s. But it wasn't that big of a deal for me. In all honesty, I knew before she told me. So nothing changed other than her officially saying, "I am a lesbian." Her being gay bothered me a heck of lot less than the fact that she was a slob! (Thank goodness we weren't roommates in school! I could have shared a room with a gay woman, but I don't think I could have shared a room with someone who was so messy! Of course, in hindsight, aren't most dorm dwellers slobs?)
Gay or straight, man or woman; it just doesn't matter all that much to me. I guess it never has. Is it really that radical that I care more about how a person acts and treats people than what sex they are (or want to be)? I want to surround myself with caring, loving, good hearted friends.
So while I may applaud Caitlyn for becoming the person she always wanted to be, from where I stand, it's just not that big a deal.