The Importance of July 9

 

On July 10th, 2021, we celebrated the 95th birthday of our dear friend and "Aunt" Julie at the church where she had been so many things...a member, a chorister, an associate pastor, a mentor...the list goes on.  Her actual birthday had been the day before, but it was a big party and so it was held on a Saturday.  My mother, who had long been a friend and "adopted" Julie into our family when she discovered that she had no family in town to celebrate the holidays with (she has plenty of actual family, just not NJ) came up from the NJ shore, where she and my father had moved, to celebrate and give a fond farewell.  "Aunt" Julie was moving back to her hometown of Waynesboro, PA, to spend the rest of her years where she could view "her" mountains and truly be home.  She had retired (or perhaps I should say that Covid had forced her to retire) from her position as Children's Chaplain at St. Joseph's Medical Center (Hospital) in Patterson, given away many of her possessions (including some beautiful cranberry glass which I keep in the built in China cabinet in my home in the Poconos) and packed up decades of belongings and memories.  Everyone was sad to see her go, but Joyful that she was doing what she wanted.  

One year later (well almost, it was actually July 8th), my mother, who had finally accepted hospice care, called as many dear friends as she could to tell them that she was dying and let them know what they meant to her.  Of course she called Julie.  While I can't recall all the conversation she had with Julie (or with the dozen or so other people that she called that day), I know Julie prayed with her.  And I know it was important that my mother speak with her.  I believe it brought her some much needed peace. My mother died the next day...Julie's 96th birthday.

I don't know if Julie knows that my mother died on her birthday.  I'm pretty sure I didn't tell her the date, but it's not hard to find out.  I didn't want to ruin her special day, because Julie is a special person.  (And that's putting it mildly.)  She has dealt with tragedies that should have destroyed her (the loss of her three children and her husband), but instead found a renewed faith and brought hope and healing to those most in need.

On July 9, 2026, my son, husband and I drove out to Waynesboro to join with her actual family and other friends to celebrate her 100th birthday.  It was an exhausting (4 hour drive each way and circumstances meant we had to do it all in one day), but exhilarating day.  We were thrilled to be part of the special day (even as I inwardly am still mourning the loss of my mother on this day 4 years ago).  Getting a hug from her warms you from the inside out.  Talking with her you know you are seen and loved.

At age 100, Julie is more cognizant and mobile than most people half her age. And I truly mean that!  She has a better memory than I do!  As for getting around, she does use a rollator (wheeled walker), but I don't know how much she really needs it.  She was standing unassisted for quite a while as she led us in prayer and told stories.  The only thing I can think of that has changed since the day she co-officiated our wedding back in the 1990s is the color of her hair!

While Julie may be blessed with good genes (how else would she have managed to survive the past 100 years?), she is also living proof that faith, giving and positivity can keep you youthful.  As her mentor (who is probably 15 years younger) and former hospital chaplain said, when Julie was making the decision to go back to school to get her Masters in Ministry when she was at the age where most people are retiring, she felt she could either become a bitter old woman (NEVER!) or take the grief and tragedy that she had experienced and use what she had learned to help others.  She took the latter path and the world is better for it.  I am not exaggerating when I say hundreds of people (or maybe that should be thousands) have been blessed by Julie's wisdom and kindness. Her doctoral thesis (several years after she was ordained she went back to get her doctorate), was published (see photo at the top of this post)  as a resource for parents.  It's title says it all.  I can say with complete conviction that the whole world would be better if people listened to and acted like Julie.

July 9th will always been a day of grief and joy for me.  I'm thankful that this past Thursday I was able to focus on the joy.

I loved my mom.  (I still do)  I love "Aunt" Julie.  How blessed I am to have had both women in my life?