Hospitality

 

Yesterday at the end of my blog post I mentioned that we haven't had many visitors to our home and that I hoped to change that in the spring/summer.  Last month I started planning for a joint birthday party (for hubby) and housewarming party.  I messaged, texted and emailed friends with a tentative date.  I called on friends from many different walks of life; some local and some who live a distance away.  I knew that those who lived far away probably wouldn't be able to come, but I purposely invited them to let them know that I was thinking of them and welcoming them.

Now I will admit that I one of the reasons I am having this party is so that I can "show off" the new house. I also want to celebrate my husband's birthday (which he doesn't often let me do).  However, mostly I want to be with friends, old and new.  I want to spend time with them.  I want to hear their stories.  I want to enjoy their companionship.   I want everyone who comes to this party, everyone who comes to this house actually, to feel welcomed.  

I'd say I'm old (and I am), but you know that.  I was raised (and I learned) to provide hospitality to guests who come to my home.  You always treat your guests with care and respect.  I think of one of my favorite books, To Kill a Mockingbird, when Scout’s classmate Walter Cunningham (whose family is so poor that his father pays Scout's father with chestnuts for his services) is invited to a midday meal.  “There’s some folks who don’t eat like us,” she whispered fiercely, “but you ain’t called on to contradict ’em at the table when they don’t. That boy’s yo’ comp’ny and if he wants to eat up the table cloth you let him, you hear?”

“He ain’t company, Cal, he’s just a Cunningham – ”

“Hush your mouth! Don’t matter who they are, anybody sets foot in this house’s yo’ comp’ny, and don’t you let me catch you remarkin’ on their ways like you was so high and mighty!”

When some visits your home, or your "turf" you welcome them.  Your offer food and drink.  Hopefully something that your guest likes.  While that might not always be possible, you should always try and at least offer alternatives.  For example, if I invited you to my house for Thanksgiving, you probably would expect turkey.  However, due to my severe food allergies, you would not find that here.  If you are close friend you would probably know that.  If not, I would have probably let you know ahead of time.  If I didn't, I would explain my situation and offer alternatives.  There's no turkey, but there is "x" as a main course along with "traditional" Thanksgiving sides.

 As a host, it is your obligation to make your guests feel at ease. Although we all have our differences, a host would never provoke a guest.  And if that guest started a fight or disagreement, as the host, you would do what you could to calm things down and not escalate things. You'd want all your guests to feel comfortable.

As human beings, we should expect hospitality when we are a guest.  We should extend hospitality to all those who enter our home.  (Or at the very least TRY our best to do so.)  It is the right thing to do.  It is the HUMAN thing to do.

Whoever you are, if you come to my home, whether it be for a party or something, anything else, know that I will do my best to welcome you with respect and thoughtfulness.  I hope you will do the same.